When you look at the landscape of sports, there are aspects of building athletes that are often overlooked. In my previous blog post, I wrote about leading with empathy and how the right messaging can help athletes believe in their coaches or leaders. Another important aspect is self-belief, something that athletes, even top ones, struggle with at various times in their careers. As coaches, teachers, or leaders, we have the power to create an environment where self-belief can thrive. The question is, how do we do that?
Through my experience as a professional athlete, I've learned that self-belief comes from consistent positive messaging, positive self-talk, and the ability to learn from failure. Consistent positive messaging isn't about shielding someone from criticism or feedback. Instead, it’s about building a foundation that supports self-belief. This doesn't mean telling someone what they want to hear but rather focusing on what they are doing right. As human beings, we tend to magnify our negatives. We can easily list ten things we dislike about ourselves but struggle to identify even three positives. Often, as an athlete, I brushed off my accomplishments because we are taught to strive for greatness and never be complacent. Now I believe , we should celebrate our accomplishments, no matter how big or small they are.
Positive self-talk might sound like advice from a yoga teacher rather than a former professional football player. However, it doesn't mean becoming complacent in pursuit of a goal. I describe it as a middle ground between what your mom would tell you and what David Goggins would tell you. It's about recognizing that you may not have achieved what you set out to do but learning from it and doing better next time. This can potentially prevent self-criticism when you fall short or fail and instead encourages learning from those experiences. What does this do? When adversity hits, you know you can get through it because you've done it before. I often tell my athletes, " there is no such thing as failure, these are only experiences to learn from."
They need to know they are capable of becoming the best version of themselves, even if the world, social media, or a scout tells them otherwise. Even if you're not a coach, you can keep this in mind when in a leadership position because the pursuit of maximizing potential is not something everyone strives to achieve. Creating an environment that nurtures self-belief requires effort and consistency, but the rewards are immeasurable. By focusing on positive reinforcement, encouraging constructive self-talk, and promoting a growth mindset, we can help athletes and those we are leading build the confidence they need to succeed.
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